#boundaries

4 Must Have Boundaries

Boundaries are essential. They protect you without energetically building walls and forts.

I hear so often that people are afraid to set boundaries, they don’t want to impose on others or they don’t even know that they can set boundaries…and they feel powerless.

Here’s the thing – if you don’t set boundaries people do not know what is okay or how you would like to be treated. Most people are not mind readers.

Boundaries are a form of self-respect, worth and value. If you keep finding yourself struggling and getting triggered by the same things, I guarantee you that you don’t have boundaries in place.

Think of boundaries as guidelines for people to know what you expect in your relationships with them.

These are the 4 Must Have Boundaries to put into place right now:

#1 For Your Time

Time is your most precious resource and the number one thing I hear people need more of. We all have the same amount of hours in the day, what differs is how we spend those hours and if we spend them HOW we want to spend them.

Set a boundary: Create a schedule for your work and personal time and adhere to it. When people come to you outside of your work hours for work, let them know when you will be able to help them.

The same is true with your personal time. Schedule in time with the people you want to see and make sure you block out time for YOU to recharge.

Also set boundaries around your social media time as well – you know that can be a huge time drain!

#2 For Your Relationships

Relationship problems or drama can so easily steer you out of balance.

By creating boundaries in your relationships it lets people know what behavior is okay and what is not. A lot of times, people do not know what the boundaries are because you have not set any. What is a problem for you may be okay with someone else.

Many relationship problems stem from people being upset at how they are being treated, but they continually let it happen – change this by setting a boundary!

Set a boundary: If you don’t know how to set boundaries with the people in your life, start by paying attention to what TRIGGERS you in your relationships. That is where you need to tell people not to do that behavior.

You can ask people not to do something, not hang out with them or give the relationship space. Make sure you hold firm to the boundaries, otherwise there is no point in setting them. You can still be around them and take the tips from #3 – don’t take on their energy.

#3 For Your Energy

Do you have people or situations that drain you? You feel completely exhausted after them – that’s because they are draining your energy and you are letting it happen.

Set a boundary: Instead, know that they can do whatever they want energetically, but you imagine their energy bouncing right off of you and back to them. You do not do this in a mean or malicious way, rather an indifferent way. You simply do not let their energy imprint on you or have an effect on you.

It is like you are a mirror and it bounces off of you and right back onto them in the same way they gave it to you, allowing you to keep your energy balanced.

#4 For Your Abundance

Abundance is a powerful energy providing you with miracles, synchronicity and support. Do not let people trample on your abundance or take advantage of you.

Abundance is more than money. It is love, opportunities, support, relationships, and basically anything that is appearing in your life at this moment.

Set a boundary: Most people need to create boundaries around not allowing people into your life that just want to drain your abundance.

Sometimes that includes your past beliefs, patterns and expectations that are no longer serving you so notice where you are preventing your own abundance.

Do not give out your abundance to things you do not believe in or because you feel you have to, do it when you want to or feel inspired instead.

It is time for you to take back your power in these areas.

Boundary setting absolutely goes both ways, so make sure you respect the boundaries that others set with you. If someone is setting a boundary, they have a reason for it. Something has happened that has made this boundary important, whether it was something someone else has done or something you have done.

Respect other’s boundaries just as you would like them to respect yours.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Create Fulfilling Relationships NOW

An area of concern for most successful entrepreneurs I work with is their RELATIONSHIPS or lack of good relationships.

Relationships are a top priority they are struggling with when they start working with me. Not having balance in your relationships throws off your personal life and ends up directly affecting your work life.

The relationships:

Are not fulfilling or supportive
You are exhausted and do not have the energy for them
You don’t have the time for them
You don’t have time for self-care like lunch or a full night’s sleep much less time for date night

Which of these relate to you right now?

Energy is simple. What you put out energetically, you receive back to you. Here are 3 easy practices to help you stop searching and start finding fulfillment in your relationships.

1. Reclaim Your Relationship with YOURSELF

The relationship you have with yourself is the most important relationship.

How you treat yourself is how others will treat you. What you believe about yourself, they will believe. They follow your lead, you set the stage:

If you think you deserve a certain type of relationship or people around you that is the tribe you will attract.
If you believe you aren’t lovable, the people in your relationships will believe that too.
If you feel alone, guess what? No one can take that away from you but YOU. You’ll find yourself surrounded by people that are there but aren’t your people and you will feel alone.
If you feel distance in your relationships, look within first. What within you is it time to shift or is there something you should be doing?
Re-evaluate struggling relationships – are they still a priority, time to put on the back burner or is it time to let them go?

Self-love and self-worth come from within. They determine how much power you feel you have. Power is an energy exchange and ideally, it is EQUAL in all your relationships.

When you find fulfillment in yourself, you are able to create relationships at work and home that are fulfilling, balanced and have boundaries.

No one else can love you enough, value you enough or cherish you enough. It starts with YOU.

How to Reclaim Your Relationship with YOURSELF

Claim your truth:

Begin by knowing in your whole being, “I am love. I am light. I am safe. I am whole.”

I am enough. You do not have to prove yourself in any relationship by your work success.

Let go of any resistance to these statements in your body because these are your energetic truths.

Feel these “I am” statements through your body from the top of your head, through your body, down to your feet and into the Earth.

2. Make Time for Your Relationships

If something is important to you, make time for it.

No one ever says on their deathbed, “I’m so glad I worked all the time.” You do not get time back with people in this life – there is no rewinding the clock to fix relationships that are neglected. You have to be present right now.

Your social life is important for your well being.

While it is great that work is such a passion and brings you joy, you will find that all work and no play does not make you happy for long. You will feel that something is missing.

Schedule time with your partner, family and friends INTO your calendar.

Yes! Block out time for them. This not only gives you time to refresh your energy and mind, but it gives you important time to spend connecting with them.

Say yes to things you would like to do and no to things you do not. Time is valuable. It is important that you make time to do things outside of work that are important, fun or relaxing.

Be Present – Unplug from Technology

Time with those that are important to you should be unplugged. Make sure you don’t have your phone glued to you.

As a successful entrepreneur, you know the importance of replying quickly and staying on top of everything – but a life outside of work is equally important. Your emails, texts and social media will be there waiting for you to do during your SET business hours…not right now.

You can walk into any restaurant and see most people are disconnected from the people they are sitting with. Electronic devices are powerful to connect you with work but not with the people physically present with you.

Nothing is worse than sitting with someone and trying to talk to them while they are more engaged with their device. Or even worse – the other person gets on their device too. Then you have groups of people physically together but not really connecting.

When someone is on their device – they don’t hear you, you don’t feel more important than whatever they are doing on their device and you will eventually choose to not spend your free time with them.

Make time to be present in your relationships. You need a break from work and being present actually makes it feel like time is going by slower not faster.

3. Create Boundaries

Boundaries are so important and are often missing for successful entrepreneurs. They are an important framework for time and actions.

One important boundary to create is around your work and your personal time. Do not work in your designated personal time. Likewise, during your work hours do not work on your personal life. Create clear times to help you be present in both areas.

Create boundaries to let people at work and at home know what is okay and what is not.

Make sure you are firm on the boundaries or people will ignore them.

Respect the boundaries that others set with you as well. Remember to treat others as you would like to be treated and COMMUNICATE your needs and feelings.

As a society, we think that people should know what we want without telling them. The problem is they are not a mind reader. You have to communicate and one way we do that is with boundaries.

How to Create Boundaries:

Let someone know when something is okay or when it is not. I feel ______ when you do ________. Please do not do this anymore.
Energetically STOP taking on everyone’s energy. Just because someone is in your presence does not mean you have to let their energy pour into you, especially when they are negative or not in a good place. You have enough on your plate already. Do not allow their energy into your being, you can say in your mind, “No thank you.” Imagine energetically pushing their energy gently back to them where it belongs.
If someone is challenging your boundary (which will happen in old relationships) remind them of the boundary and be firm. If they continue to ignore the boundary sometimes space is needed or it is time for the relationship to end.
Follow the boundaries you create. There is no point in creating a boundary you will not enforce and make sure you respect other people’s boundaries as well. What goes around, comes around energetically.

Above are three easy practices you can start doing TODAY to stop searching and find fulfillment in your relationships. I have a whole book dedicated to supporting you in creating healthy, fulfilling and balanced relationships.

Relationships are important. Start using these practices daily to reclaim your relationships.

I am love. I am whole. I create fulfilling relationships.

Start living a successful, fulfilling and balanced life. It begins with YOU.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

4 Quick and Powerful Shifts from Overwhelm into Balance

As a successful entrepreneur and a Spiritual Medium, Healer & Coach, I hear these things all the time:

My to-do list is never ending.
There is so much on my plate, I don’t even know where to begin.
My business is so busy, I don’t have time for anything for me – like lunch, a date or a full night’s sleep.
How can I stay focused, confident and on top of everything in my relationships and in my business?

You want to be everything to everyone but you have so much on your plate.

I get it!

While you can manage being out of balance for a little bit of time, it’s not sustainable and it doesn’t work long term for you or those around you.

Add any change into your life right now whether you are choosing it or you feel it’s happening to you and it’s just too much! It tips the scales because you are already maxed out!

Balance is the key to SUCCESS in all areas of your life.

So how you can move from overwhelm and burnt out into BALANCE in the relationships most important to you?

It all starts with you.

Pick the area to reclaim that will help you the most and begin there. It’s time to get back on track in all areas! Reclaim your time, relationships, inner game and energy.

1. Reclaim your Abundance

What you create in your mind, you create around you. Balance begins by creating thoughts that are going to help you get where you would like to go.

Every thought you think and every word you use is creating your reality in this moment.

This moment shapes the next and things are put into motion and become reality without you even realizing it:

Pay attention to family patterns, thoughts and beliefs that are shaping your experiences and notice if they are still supporting you or if it is time for new ones.

How are fears and doubts limiting or preventing you from creating happy, fulfilling relationships?

How to Reclaim Your Abundance

Be Grateful

Being grateful is the most powerful thing you can do to overcome your fears and doubts. It immediately puts you into the present moment and attracts more of these things into your life.

First pause.

Imagine stopping or freezing the thought and let it go.

Then be grateful for something you are truly grateful for in this moment (not what you think you SHOULD be grateful for) and you’ve reclaimed your power in that moment.

I am grateful for ____________.

Use “I am” Statements

“I am” is the most powerful thing you can say. Whatever comes after is what you create.

Think about it:

“I am hungry.” This makes you hungrier.
“I am lonely.” You’ll notice you keep feeling lonelier.

Try these instead:

“I am peace.”
“I am calm.”
“I am free.”
“I am love.”
“I am light.”
“I am abundant.”

These are inner game changers for you!

Write the one that best supports you on a post-it note and put somewhere you can see throughout the day to help you reclaim your abundance and what you’re creating in your life. Keep them at 3 words! I am __________.

Remember, what you focus on is what you create. For tips to reclaim your inner game on your finances and abundance, read this – The Drive for More Money.

2. Reclaim your Relationships

The relationship you have with yourself is the most important relationship.

How you treat yourself is how others will treat you. They follow your lead, you set the stage:

If you think you deserve a certain type of relationship or people around you that is the tribe you will attract.
If you believe you aren’t lovable, the people in your relationships will believe that too.
If you feel alone, guess what? No one can take that away from you but YOU. You’ll find yourself surrounded by people that are there but aren’t your people and you will feel alone.

Self-love and self-worth come from within. They determine how much power you feel you have. Power is an energy exchange and ideally, it is EQUAL in all your relationships.

When you find fulfillment in yourself, you are able to create relationships at work and home that are fulfilling, balanced and have boundaries.

How to Reclaim Your Relationships

Claim your truth:

Begin by knowing in your whole being, “I am love. I am light. I am safe. I am whole.”

Let go of any resistance to these statements in your body because these are your energetic truths.

Feel these “I am” statements through your body from the top of your head, through your body, down to your feet and into the Earth.

Boundaries:

We think that people should know what we want without us telling them. The problem is they are not a mind reader. We have to communicate and one way we do that is with boundaries.

Create boundaries to let people at work and at home know what is okay and what is not. Make sure you are firm on the boundaries or people will ignore them.

An important boundary to create is around work and your personal time. Don’t work in your personal time and at work, don’t work on your personal life. Create clear times to help you be present in both areas.

Respect the boundaries that others set with you as well. Remember to treat others as you would like to be treated. For more support in this area, read Stop Searching and Find Fulfillment in Your Relationships.

3. Reclaim your Time

This is the number one thing I hear from successful entrepreneurs that directly affects all the other areas: “I don’t have any time.”

Yes, you are busy and your work is your passion. But somewhere along the line, work became your life.

Now you are feeling overwhelmed and unfulfilled. Money is nice but something is missing – enjoying all the fruits of your labor, living a fulfilling life and playing.

How to Reclaim Your Time

Create a Work Schedule

Create work hours and stick to them.

Do not (no matter how tempted you are!) work in your personal time. A life outside of work is very important for you and your relationships.

Do not check email and social media outside of your designated work times. You can set times throughout the day and stick to those times.

Prioritize

Complete the most important tasks first and the rest will be completed as it can be.

You can intuitively tune in to see what is the most important thing each day. Each day, priorities change based upon your work’s demands and flow with that.

Be Realistic with Your Schedule

This can be a tough one for most entrepreneurs. Often you are overly ambitious with how much you can squeeze into each day.

Schedule less into each day than you think you should. This will save time for any last minute emergencies or priorities.

Only say “YES” to things you actually would like to do. Feel free to say “NO” (no explanation needed) for events and activities that you dread doing or that do not make sense for you to do.

Schedule in Time to “BE”

Schedule in time for self care. Self care is often hair, nails and massages – sometimes a facial. It’s not enough because it’s doing and not being.

You have to schedule in days that are blank!

This will allow you to rest, take time to “be“, time to flow with the day and have a break from always being scheduled and it gives you space to be present.

Stop watching time go by and start enjoying time in the present moment. You can also meditate, do daily energy work, get outside and enjoy nature or spend time with those you love.

4. Reclaim your Energy

By taking time each day to get back in balance you will have more energy and a renewed purpose. You are not meant to go-go-go all the time as this leads to burn out and overwhelm.

Listen to what will best support your body and do it. The more balanced you are, the easier it is to take on any obstacles or struggles that come your way.

Your body is your compass. It will guide you, you just have to listen.

It will tell you if you need to eat, go to the bathroom, go for a walk, exercise, etc.

How to Reclaim Your Energy

Listen

Listen to what your body is asking you to do. It can be as simple as sitting down and taking a few minutes to be or just pausing and taking a deep breath.

Your body will tell you if it’s time to do some exercise, eat, sleep, etc. All you have to do is listen.

Sleep

Make sure you are getting enough rest. This is important for you and those around you. 7 simple steps to help you sleep is right here.

The less sleep you get, the more likely you are to be short, crabby or annoyed. You also won’t have energy to make the best decisions.

Sleep at night is just as important as taking a nap. Listen to your body as exhaustion leads to illness and you do not have time for that!

Eat

Don’t skip meals! This leads to you grabbing easy to eat junk and often adds to weight concerns.

Eat food that nurtures your body. Prep meals or healthy snacks in advance to prevent eating junk food.

Eating also gives you time to take a break and energize, reassess and fuel up for what is next.

By reclaiming your time, you will feel present and regain your power. You didn’t go into business for yourself to be a slave to your job. What can you start doing to reclaim your time each day?

Do Energy Work Daily

A daily energy work practice is VITAL to helping you stay in balance energetically. Here is a simple yet powerful practice I teach my clients. This video series will show you how to balance your energy with White Light, how to let go of any stress and negativity you are holding onto and how to refill those areas with positive energy.

You and those around you will notice a huge shift in you when you do your daily energy work.

The energy you give off is what is attracted back to you. By reclaiming your energy and power in these four areas, you will create a shift within you that will help you create balance. What is happening within you, is reflected around you.

Success is possible in all areas of your life. Start with one shift and start reclaiming your time, relationships, abundance and energy. It starts with YOU.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Creating Boundaries with Your Work

When you’re overwhelmed, you may not feel like you have the energy to create boundaries, you’re just trying to stay afloat. Energetically, this is the most important time to have them so that you can balance your energy and RECLAIM your power. When you are over-stressed, you aren’t doing your best work.

There are so many ways to create boundaries and through the years I have helped my clients create boundaries that are easy to implement and continue to use. Otherwise, if it’s too much work or too hard, you’re not going to do it.

One of the most important things that have helped my clients create boundaries is to realize what you are missing out on by not creating them. Every time you say YES to something, you are saying NO to something else. The no is usually to you and your self care because that is what will get pushed to the bottom of the priorities, after all there are only so many hours in the day.

Boundaries in the work place depend on your job and your actual job requirements. Many people often feel obligated to take on more work and for some it is part of the job.

Are you taking on too much?

How “on call” are you after hours? Is this required or something you do because you love to work or feel you have to?
How many hours constitute your work day? 8 hours? 10? 12? How long are you supposed to work and how long do you work? Are they part of your job or do you take them on because you feel you have to?
When you leave work, do you actually leave work or are you still working?
Do you take a lunch or do you feel you have so much work to do that you have to work through it?
How do you feel in your work environment? What does your relationships with your co-workers look like?
How easily do you fall asleep on your own at night? This is a very important question! Can you fall asleep on your own or do you need help to fall asleep because you can’t shut your mind off because you are so focused on your work?

What changes are within your power at work to create? Do you want to make any changes?

Easy boundaries to create at work to take care of YOU:

Take your LUNCH. It gives you time to fuel your body, check in with anything outside of work and it gives you space to re energize and come back to work re-focused.
Don’t check work email an hour before you go to bed. This gives you time to start a bedtime routine to help you fall asleep on your own.
Any ideas for the next day that are keeping you from sleeping, write them all down on a piece of paper and imagine them leaving your mind. You have them written down, you can access them again in the morning, assess their priority and add into your schedule as needed.
Start your day with a good morning routine.
Pay attention to what you say yes to. When you take on extra tasks, why are you doing that? Does it help your career or is it just adding more to your plate and to do list. Remember, what are you going to say “no” to.
Stay away from workplace DRAMA. There are no winners in drama, it is an energy warp.
When you find yourself taking on other people’s energy, in your mind, say, “no thank you!” Do not build walls to “protect” yourself. I spend a lot of time helping people energetically remove those walls. Instead, imagine as their energy is coming at you energetically saying, “no thank you” and giving it back to them the same way they gave it to you.

Boundaries are totally up to you!

You tell people what is okay and what isn’t by the boundaries you draw. No one is going to tell you to work less, it’s up to you to you to figure out what boundaries are best for you in your role.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

7 Easy Tips to Simplify Your Workday

How does your calendar look for the week? The month? As a Spiritual Medium, Healer & Coach I feel your pain, literally! So let’s focus this question and make it less overwhelming…

What does your work schedule look like today?

Chances are, your list is longer than the hours in your work day. Even by working more than 8 hours, your list will most likely not get completed today and things will get added that are unforeseen. The more you cram into each day hurts YOU!

You live in a society of go, go, go and over plan your days to the max…until you can’t any longer. Eventually you will burn out, if you haven’t already. Most people come to me when they have reached their breaking point but there are ways to stop this from happening.

Sometimes you have control over your schedule, sometimes you don’t but there are things within your day that you DO have control over.

The question is: Are you READY to live and work in a more balanced way?

As crazy as this may seem, you get to choose how overworked you are. You absolutely do!

You know where your current path is going to lead you. You have heard the saying, “No one ever says on their deathbed that they wished they worked more.” Since I can see and talk with spirits, I can absolutely verify this from before they cross over, during their transition and after they have crossed over. They never wish they worked more or had more money. Ever! Once they cross over, they wonder why we do what we do, the irony! They wish they had spent their time better.

Your life is about your experiences, creating memories (because those you WILL take with you) and living your truth.

7 Tips to Help You Stop Cramming so Much into Your Workday:

Be REALISTIC with your daily schedule. Schedule in less than what you think you can actually accomplish and leave space for important last minute things that have to happen today.
LUNCH is important, so schedule it into your calendar! You will be so much more productive after you fuel your body and you take a little break from work.
PRIORITIZE. Complete the most important tasks first and the rest will be completed as it can be. You can intuitively tune in to see what is the most important thing each day. Each day, priorities change based upon your company’s demands.
FLOW through your day. When things come up, pause, breathe and let go of how you expected the day to go (this is why you leave space in your schedule!) The more you flow, the more you will accomplish.
Color code tasks so you can look at the day, week and month and see where things are out of whack so you can adjust your schedule as needed. This really helps you put each week and the whole month into perspective!
This one also carries into your personal life, say YES to things you actually want to do and NO to things you do not! You cannot be everything to everybody, it’s physically impossible. Do what you can and delegate the things you cannot.
Schedule time each day to BE. I know this sounds crazy with everything you are doing, but it is very important for you to create a space for you to connect with your body, mind, spirit and emotions. This will help keep you from feeling overwhelmed, it will give you space to put everything into perspective and help you refocus.

What can you start implementing right now to make your days more productive and balanced? If you need help getting your life back into balance, I’m just a message away!

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Categories

Tag: #boundaries

4 Must Have Boundaries

These are the 4 Must Have Boundaries to put into place right now:

#1 For Your Time

#2 For Your Relationships

#3 For Your Energy

#4 For Your Abundance

It is time for you to take back your power in these areas.

Create Fulfilling Relationships NOW

1. Reclaim Your Relationship with YOURSELF

How to Reclaim Your Relationship with YOURSELF

2. Make Time for Your Relationships

Schedule time with your partner, family and friends INTO your calendar.

Be Present – Unplug from Technology

3. Create Boundaries

How to Create Boundaries:

4 Quick and Powerful Shifts from Overwhelm into Balance

1. Reclaim your Abundance

How to Reclaim Your Abundance

2. Reclaim your Relationships

How to Reclaim Your Relationships

3. Reclaim your Time

How to Reclaim Your Time

4. Reclaim your Energy

How to Reclaim Your Energy

Creating Boundaries with Your Work

Are you taking on too much?

Easy boundaries to create at work to take care of YOU:

7 Easy Tips to Simplify Your Workday

The question is: Are you READY to live and work in a more balanced way?

7 Tips to Help You Stop Cramming so Much into Your Workday:

Recent Posts