#selfhelp

A Spiritual Medium’s Guide: How to BREAK FREE from a Long Term Relationship

Leaving a long-term relationship is not easy. It’s not something you do lightly.

You can’t eat. You can’t sleep. You cry all the time. You feel like you’re letting them down. You’re letting the family down. You feel guilty for the relationship ending.

Chances are you have done everything you can think of – even things recommended to you to make this relationship WORK – not end. You’ve done the self-help books, seen a therapist, and maybe even tried some energy work, meditation and yoga. Yet here you are – at a place where you feel stuck and don’t know how to do what you have to do.

What you didn’t want to do – leave this relationship of ___ years.

It’s hard. I know, I have helped so many women through relationship endings I can’t even give you a number. I have heard all the reasons that make it hard:

You don’t want to start over.
You don’t know what to do next or what the future looks like.
You have responsibilities.
You don’t want to lose your money or retirement.
This ending makes you feel like a failure (but remember, relationships take 2 active participants!)

Usually you will hit your breaking point – a point where you have done all you can and it is time to move on in your relationship with your spouse or partner of __ years.

Most relationships do not last a lifetime. They have a season. When that season is getting ready to end on a relationship, it can throw you into a tailspin and leave you feeling stuck and completely out of balance. Sometimes for decades but it doesn’t have to be that way.

How You Get Stuck

Even if the relationship is bad for you and you know it’s no longer a fit, it is hard to move on for many reasons:

You are emotionally attached to your relationship.

You’ve been together for __ years. Even if you leave, you find yourself emotionally stuck, recreating the exact same relationship with someone else or so hurt from the experience that you cling onto it years, even decades later.

My client’s have left relationships after 10 years and 20 years and they didn’t think they could do it even though they wanted to and now they are LOVING their lives. They are doing things they love, they’re starting to date and they are so happy they left. They cannot believe the transformation. The longer you prolong the inevitable you keep yourself from living a life you will love.

It’s familiar.

Even though it’s broken, it’s safe. You know EXACTLY what to expect.

You know the patterns, the routines and you have hoped for so long that something would change and it would get better. Even if the relationship was emotionally abusive, it’s familiar.

It’s a vicious cycle. Even when you leave, you still hope for a change in the other person that doesn’t come. If they haven’t changed, they aren’t going to. No one changes until they are READY and chances are they aren’t changing anytime soon.

You’re afraid.

There are so many fears – being alone, the financial implications, moving, boundaries, the unknown, what will this person think, how will this affect ___.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard from clients, “I don’t want to give them my money.” This statement will REALLY hold you back for years and then health issues will start to appear. I’ve seen it time and time again. I’ve helped clients realize that the more money they make, the more they can truly live the life they envisioned. Don’t focus on them. Focus on YOU and YOU being FREE!

Or “I take care of them, what will they do?” They are an adult. I promise you, they will figure it out. Taking care of them is what their parents did, not your responsibility as a partner. They will eat, get their laundry done, they will figure it out like the adult that they are.

Change is hard.

This is going to be a big change and you probably don’t like change but remember, life is a series of changes from the moment you are born. Nothing freezes in time. Change is all around you.

Even when you say you like changes, you don’t mean changes like this. You mean starting a new job. Buying a new car. Buying a new house. Fun changes.

I had a client that loved changes, she told me all the time until she left her husband. Then change was hard and she hated it. But luckily they both worked with me through the relationship transition and they’ve both moved on to create new lives that they love. He even went off to have the baby he always wanted and he’s engaged.

Change happens to help you create something NEW. I wrote a whole book on change with exercises to support you and keep you moving forward. Remember what’s harder than change, staying where you are. It can stifle you.

Eventually you will reach a point where it is harder for you to stay than it is for you to go.

And this is the moment you are ready and where I have decades of experience with clients using my intuitive abilities as a Spiritual Medium and I can support you in creating a life you LOVE again.

How to Transition OUT of Your Relationship

You have to be READY. Ready for help. Ready to leave. Ready for new and exciting possibilities.

You have to actually LEAVE. Wanting to leave and talking about leaving are not the same as actually leaving. If you are afraid to leave or are unsure what to do, get help. Especially in abusive situations, having support is key.

Drama is not the answer!! I see this ALL the time. Drama will hold you connected to this person energetically in this life and others (karma) and it will keep you from moving forward, being free and bringing in new opportunities. Remain as calm, peaceful and objective as possible.

The moment you are ready, you can dissolve the relationship and both of you can get back to creating a new life. One that you will both love.

Here’s what I teach my clients to do in the relationship:

Stand in your power When you stand in your power, you will feel better and create a life that you love. This is especially important for my clients that have left emotionally abusive relationships. Handing over your power leaves you helpless and out of control but once you recognize the patterns and start to stand in your power, you will love your life again.
Break the patterns. If you don’t break the patterns, you will keep creating the same situations with different people. The goal is to stop doing what got you into this situation and not recreate it ever again with another partner. Otherwise, there really is no point in leaving. Break the patterns!
Drawing and enforcing boundaries are key. They tell people what is okay and what isn’t. If you don’t draw boundaries, they don’t know. The majority of the population cannot read your mind. Boundaries aren’t bad and they don’t make you mean. They are necessary and help you stand in your power. Boundaries have been a game changer for my clients.
Energy work is vital to helping you stay in balance and in a good space energetically. The practice I teach all my clients is easy, has amazing results and doesn’t take a lot of time.
Start living a life that you LOVE. Remember that vision you had for yourself? It’s time to start taking steps towards that vision. You have that vision for a reason. Step into it and let go of the past. Learn from the past, don’t live in the past.
Create new, fulfilling relationships. Don’t sit at home alone with a bottle of wine, that will make you depressed. Surround yourself with people that lift you up and you lift up as well. Also, say goodbye to any other relationships that are no longer a fit, this is common when a relationship comes to an end. As you change, your friends change.

While a relationship coming to an end may seem like a failure, it’s not. Everything happens when and as it should. Remember, you tried EVERYTHING you could to make it work.

It’s the beginning of something new. You did the best you could, with what you had at the time. Stop judgement. Stop any blame. Be accountable and keep moving forward.

When you have tried everything you could to fix it all but no matter what you do, you feel it is time to END the relationship it’s important to not only free yourself, but them as well.

I have helped countless women end relationships and create a life that they love. They didn’t think it was possible and now they look back at how far they’ve come and they are GRATEFUL they left. Now they LOVE their life. You can too!

I am free. You are free. We are both free.

Move forward on your new path, heal your triggers and live a life you LOVE.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Healing Generational Patterns with a Spiritual Medium

Generational patterns run DEEP in your family just like disease processes do. What runs in your family is passed down to you but you have the power to change these patterns.

You live by these patterns often without realizing or questioning them. They are engrained into your energy.

As a Spiritual Medium, I work with Generational Patterns often and they guide all areas of your life.

Generational Patterns shape and define your:

Relationships
Abundance
Time
Energy
Mindset

You will find yourself doing the things your parents did, your grandparents and so on until you start to recognize the pattern, stop it and create a new one. Just because they’ve been handed down to you, doesn’t mean they have to continue to have power over you.

What Are Generational Patterns?

Generational Patterns are most often energy patterns that are passed down to you through your biological family and they are strong patterns.

You can also pick up on Generational Patterns from those you are around a lot as a child like your care givers, role models, adopted parents, etc.

Generational Patterns are stored energetically in a specific area of your body. It imprints into your energy and continues through the generations until you stop it and heal it in your body.

They show up in how you take risks or don’t, how you take care of your body or don’t, your abundance beliefs, your intimate partner experiences, how you spend your time, etc. Look at how you spend money, who else in your family spends it the same way? It’s a Generational Pattern.

Healing it in your body doesn’t heal it in your ancestors. They have to do the work to break these patterns in their life. But when you shift it in your life, it will affect your future generations because you changed the pattern.

Discovering Your Generational Patterns

These patterns are not only in your energy but they are taught to you at a young age often by the people who passed the energy on.

Let’s go back to your childhood. What is your EARLIEST memory about:

How relationships are? How to be treated in a relationship?
MONEY. What is your earliest belief about money? Your earliest belief spending money?
How to spend time? Constantly on the go? Put things off to the last minute?
What were you taught about energy? How to spend your energy?

Now look at how these patterns are STILL showing up in your life today! Are they working? Usually they aren’t because they aren’t yours.

Breaking Free from Your Generational Patterns

You have the power to live, create and shift your life in every moment. That includes changing the Generational Patterns in your life.

Are you ready to BREAK free from your Generational Patterns that are no longer serving you?

Get objective – notice they are there and how they are guiding your life and other family members.
Shift in your pivotal moment – recognize you are following the Generational Pattern. Stop going into the actions and energy of the pattern and shift in that moment.
Do what you would like to do instead of what you were just routinely going to do.
Create a daily energy work practice to help you clear your energy.

Just because something has been a pattern for decades for you and longer for your family, doesn’t mean you have to keep doing it when it no longer supports you. You have the power to create a life you love in every moment.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

From Exhausted to Energized: How Working with a Spiritual Medium Changed Everything

As a Spiritual Medium, most of my clients come to me when they’re at their breaking point. You know – when what you’re doing is physically no longer working, you don’t know what to do and something HAS to change right NOW.

I started working with one of my private clients (that I am keeping anonymous, like I do all of my private clients) a little over two years ago. She wasn’t new to healers or energy work. She was building her business but that was all she was doing – working ALL the time.

She wasn’t spending time with her family, she wasn’t taking care of her body and dating was completely out of the picture.

She was stuck in a vicious cycle of feast or famine and didn’t have the time or energy to change the patterns she was stuck in.

Career driven women often have the same struggle:

Working all hours of the day
Working through weekends and those vacations you live for
You’re tired and don’t have energy or time for your relationships
It doesn’t matter what goals, income or titles you’ve acquired, you are hustling and immediately onto the next goal
Your body takes the back seat and you find yourself getting sick more often or having more injuries
You’re not enjoying this amazing life you’ve created

We Began to Heal her Success Wound

The first thing we did was address the Generational Patterns from her mom that were energetically driving her but no longer serving her and feeding her Success Wound. She was proving “I am love”, “I am worthy” and “I am enough” in every area of her life. This came off as her being needy and clingy. She wasn’t attracting abundance, quality clients or men.

Her mom was never around and she was creating the same environment for her kids.

We created boundaries around the hours she would work, a process to only attract in perfect clients, created a schedule for her to workout, time for her to spend with family and friends, vacations at times in each quarter where she could actually get away and she started DATING someone she was intuitively introduced to and magnetically drawn to.

But the REAL changes came from the energy work. I helped her get on her best path and cleared and reprogramed her energy once a week in her private session. She has been to all my live events in the last year that have helped her up-level in a group environment.

She has learned how to balance her energy and specific energy work and abundance practices that she does every day. This has shifted the clients she now attracts and she has a thriving business AND a lifestyle she loves.

Are you struggling and at your breaking point? Then working with a Spiritual Medium is your fastest path to a complete turn around to transform your life into the one you envision.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

An Insider’s Look at My Work as a Spiritual Medium

You’re either drawn to psychics and mediums or you’re not. There is no gray area but when you love them – you LOVE them.

Mediums are also psychics and are here to help you with something big in your life. Whether it’s connecting with someone that has crossed over or healing your energy, the work is more powerful because the way medium’s read, see, feel and work with energy.

If you google mediumship, most of us don’t tell you exactly what we do. We think you just know but we use our abilities in different ways.

I wrote about how I became aware of my abilities as a Spiritual Medium. Now I’m pulling back my curtain and telling you exactly what I can do with my abilities in my work as a Spiritual Medium.

1. My Abilities as a Spiritual Medium

I See Spirits and Energy

Spirits

While I can see, feel, hear and read the messages spirits give me, this is a small portion of the work I do as a Spiritual Medium.

My work isn’t in solving crimes or doing all the communication for you. It’s in helping you connect with them yourself so you can talk with them whenever.

I energetically bring you together in the same space, help you communicate with them directly (which is always the best way) with your newfound abilities and I help you heal anything that is lingering or unsaid.

The spirits always appear. They may not stay long but they always give a message and want you to know how to recognize them when they come back – whether it’s a feeling, a knowing, seeing or hearing them. You have the ability to connect with them too and I help you do that.

Energy

Providing mini sessions at an event I energetically supported in San Diego, November 2019

Energy is anything that gives off energy – people, plants, animals, the Earth.

I have the ability to become ONE with energy. I can feel energy that has been put onto something or someone such as a curse, worrying, or negative energy. I also feel the energy you are storing in your body in my body until it is cleared and aligned. I can also experience your past lives (you’ve had millions of them.)

Typically you store energy until you feel stuck or at your breaking point. I help you reset your energy and tap into your abilities so you can do it as well. I teach you to become aware of the things that are affecting your energy and others like:

The energy you are giving off
Your energy exchanges
Entities, negative energies, vampires, demons (whatever you like to call them – they’re all the same) that you allow to attach to you or come into your space
The energy you have stored in your body from this life or a past life experience
The energy you have taken on to “help” (but not really) others with their problems
What raises and lowers your energy vibration
What you store in your body when you’re angry and frustrated to “deal” with later and you never do.
Anything that negatively impacts you, your decisions, and how you feel.

To sum it up, I basically work in balancing your energy and getting you back to your natural state – a place of light and love. Added bonus – I do all of this remotely.

I am an Energy Healer

I see the energy you store, fragment and are ready to heal.

I do this by pulling you out victimhood, self-sabotage, unhealthy patterns, old beliefs, generational energy patterns, negative energy and anything else that tries to lower your vibration.

It starts with getting to the root of the energy that’s guiding you and then clearing out how it is manifesting in your body and your reality. Then we reprogram that area with positive energy and tell the mind what to focus on instead. You become aware of what you’re creating with your thoughts, words and patterns.

You feel like you had a massage but you were never touched. You feel free. Supported. Balanced. And most importantly, you learn what to do to reset your energy and mindset!

I am Psychic

I am psychic but I don’t call myself one because I have no interest in doing psychic readings. There is no power in that for you. That is why I combine my intuitive abilities with coaching and am a Mindset and Energy Coach – to empower YOU!

I use my psychic abilities to see your best path and help you get back on it.
I can read the people and situations in your life and help you get more objective and clearly see what is going on.
I can see your path choices, how things can go, what you should focus on and what it is time for you to heal.
I see what you are creating with your thoughts, words and actions and how to shift your reality to what you originally envisioned for yourself.

Free will is always there so my work is about teaching you how to navigate your life and tune into your own intuition, become aware of your gifts and listen to your body.

2. How I Work

I am Always Ready and On

With my abilities, I don’t have any prep that I have to do. I just tune into you and I’m there reading your energy, knowing what I’m here to help you with and ready to go once you tell me what you would like help with. It always comes back to me empowering you.

I can work remotely without ever seeing what you look like, what you do or who you are. In 2000 I worked with people on the phone without ever seeing them.
I have clients around the world that I don’t work with in person. Most of my work is through video conferencing.
I don’t have to see you to read your energy. I don’t research you or touch you. I prefer to not know a thing about you so it doesn’t taint what I’m seeing.
I don’t have to have any of your belongings or anyone else’s.
I just tune in, read the energy and feel what you are storing in your body. I know what is bothering you and why.
When I am working at a mastermind or event and I do individual work, with permission I will hold your hands to align you faster to accommodate our 15 or 30 minute time frame.

It is all about healing what it is time to heal and raising your energy vibration.

I Work in Light

My live event in November 2019 at Four Seasons Aviara

I am constantly in a beam of White Light. If I hear a voice it comes from the light and I hear it very clearly.

All the energy healing I do comes from the light. I am a channel for it. I don’t speak with angels and guides. I am not wired that way. I go straight up and I simply connect and know.

I Know Who to Work with and When

While I am always on and constantly reading energy, I have learned to only pay attention when I’m supposed to help someone with something. This means, I ignore a lot of the things I see and read because I’m not supposed to do anything with it.

I can only help when I am asked to help. You have to be ready.

Some people want to stay where they are. Some people like being stuck. Those aren’t my people. My people are career driven (majority women) at or near their breaking point that are ready to reset and get back to the lifestyle they originally envisioned.

I Empower You through Coaching

Coaching is my method of delivering my abilities because it empowers you and puts you in control of your experience.

I don’t want anyone dependent on me or any other healer, medium or psychic for a decision. You have intuitive abilities – listen to them!

I teach simple practices that are easy to do and the results my clients get are amazing!

While a session here and there was a huge part of my work for over 15 years, now I only work in programs. Why? Because a session here and there while amazing wasn’t helping you move forward. It was just a band aide until you reached a trigger that threw you completely off. By working with me for a set period of time, not only do we hit your goals but you have support for the different triggers you experience throughout the year so you keep up-leveling.

Whether it is hitting 60k months (some of my clients have 100k + months), leaving an abusive relationship, or helping my clients completely reset their lives to get back on track – they get back to their goals and to the original lifestyle they envisioned for themselves.

That doesn’t happen with a session here and there. It’s a commitment. It’s an up-leveling. It’s healing and freeing. It’s the long term work that I am here to teach you and support you with. The results are amazing and life changing.

Balance is Everything

I not only teach balance but I LIVE it!

Energy work at a live event on the beach in Spring 2019

I work with individuals and groups of all sizes. I become one with energy individually and in a group setting and know what to do to help you reset. My work is helping you get your head, energy and life on point.

It wasn’t an easy journey to get to where I am today in my career. Being a Spiritual Medium is absolutely about healing the energy in me so I can do the same for you. I do the energy work I teach every day throughout the day as needed. I also thrive because of my morning and evening routines.

The work I do is physically exhausting. I have to be in a good place physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Boundaries and communication are important in my work. I balance my schedule, eat enough protein, have clear boundaries and make self-care a daily priority.

Balance is key for you too. How different would your life be if you were grounded, focused, aligned and empowered? Imagine being successful in all areas of your life. That’s what I help you do! Here’s a videoI made that talks about the different types of mediums, what I do as a Spiritual Medium and how I found my balance.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

How to EXPAND Your TIME

I don’t have TIME.

What you’re really saying:

I don’t have boundaries.
I don’t prioritize.
I can’t say no.
What I want to do isn’t important.
I don’t make time for me.
I’m busy proving that I am worthy, enough and love.

So the next time you want to say, “I don’t have time.” I want you to look at this list and pay attention to what you’re really saying.

Because you DO have time.

86,400 seconds EVERY day. The question is are you spending them in ways that bring you JOY?

Time is a commodity and you want to consciously spend it.

Here are 4 simple practices that will help you EXPAND time so you can start enjoying this amazing life you’ve been creating.

1. Implement More Self-Care

When you’re on an airplane they tell you to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, then you can help others. This is so true for all areas in your life!

If you are tired, overwhelmed and exhausted you do not have the energy for everything else you want to do in work and in life. And time flies by! Did you ever notice that?

Make time for self-care so you can be more present and in the moment.

Self-care can include exercising, getting enough sleep at night, having a date night, reading a book for pleasure – not learning, eating foods that support your body, a massage, facial, meditation, an energy work practice and so much more.

What self-care would best support you right now? Make sure you get it scheduled on your weekends and into packed work days to help you expand your time.

2. Create Routines

Routines tell you what to do at certain times of the day. They help you expand time because you don’t waste time thinking about what you need to do and when. You just do them and get them done.

Create routines that will best support you with your goals:

Want to stay more balanced? Create a morning routine to help you start your day in balance. Added bonus – you’ll feel better and you won’t feel so rushed.
Trying to fall asleep at night? It is such a waste of time! If you want to fall asleep easily and without medication create an evening routine to help you drift into dreamland quickly. There’s a reason you had a bedtime routine as a child! Sleep is key to making sure that you are present and energized throughout the day. If you’re tired, you waste that time not being as focused or productive.
The same is true for eating healthy, exercising, doing hobbies you love. Create a routine that will give you more time in the areas you are working on.

What routines would help support you and give you more time?

3. Balance Your Schedule

I know you love your work and that you are driven BUT your goal wasn’t to work all the time. Your goal was to have a freedom lifestyle – one where you actually get to enjoy all these things you’ve worked so hard for!

Your vision wasn’t to live for your weekends and vacations. When you do that, you’re too tired to enjoy them and they go by way too fast! Plus you usually end up plugging into work anyhow.

Instead create a work schedule and STICK to it!

Look at your calendar at the beginning of the month and each week and look at how it is balanced or not. Each morning look at your schedule and hold firm to your start and stop times for work. Don’t overbook, instead leave intentional spaces for those last minute priorities.

By creating a balanced schedule, you won’t feel rushed and you’ll be able to get in all the things you want to do. You’ll expand your time for things you want and love to do!

4. Say “NO” More Often

When you say no to something, you are saying yes to something for you.

How? Because you spend a lot of your day saying yes to things that take away time for you to do the things you wanted to do for yourself. It’s the only thing you can take away from to squeeze this “thing” in.

By saying NO, you say yes to that walk, a book, a reasonable bedtime. See where I’m going with this?

What can you say no to and reclaim more time in your day?

Not having time is a choice.

You have so much power over how you spend your time. What will you start doing differently? How will you start to reclaim your most precious commodity – time?

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Why the Hustle is a SHORT Term Solution

If the hustle is only sustainable short term energetically, emotionally and physically, why do we do it for years? Decades even?

Because it’s encouraged in our society. You are told from a very early age:

You want to be successful, you need to hustle.
You want to make a big impact or income, you have to hustle.
If you want to do anything in this life, you better hustle.

Understanding the Hustle

Let’s start with the definition of HUSTLE:

Verb: obtain by forceful action or persuasion.

Noun: busy movement and activity.

Physically, emotionally and energetically neither definition is SUSTAINABLE.

Yet the hustle is glorified and ingrained in our society for centuries, especially if you’re career driven:

“Without hustle, talent will only carry you so far.” – Gary Vaynerchuk
“I’d rather hustle 24/7 than slave 9 to 5.” – Unknown
“Work like there is someone working 24 hours a day to take it away from you” – Mark Cuban
“Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.” – Abraham Lincoln

This has created a REAL problem that no one thinks they can change. After all, success is defined by who is hustling the most.

The hustle has become a work lifestyle and it is such a myth because the hustle is not sustainable by anyone. Anyone…

When is the Hustle No Longer Supporting Me?

The hustle can work, but only SHORT TERM. You will know when the hustle is starting to hurt you.

You’ll notice:

Your relationships are struggling or non-existent
You are sick often or keep injuring yourself
Putting on weight and unhappy with your body image
You’re exhausted and sleep is difficult
Life and time is literally flying by you
You’re not fulfilled, enjoying life, or able to relax at the end of the day.

You get to decide what success means to you. Hustling does not guarantee success. You can hustle without success. You can have success without hustling.

What is your definition of success?

Is it by how much you hustle and how exhausted you are? (If so, you may want to stop reading here!)
Is it by how much you enjoy this amazing life you’ve created?
Do you define success by achieving milestones you’ve set?
Are you living YOUR definition of success?

Most successful entrepreneurs are not. They find that they got stuck in the pattern to hustle and keep scaling and they just keep doing what they know. But there is another way!

You Can Have Success without the Hustle

Oprah is the DEFINITION of the American dream and I challenge you to find a quote where she says the hustle is the answer to success. Seriously, I would love to see it.

“It makes no difference how many peaks you reach if there was no pleasure in the climb.” ― Oprah Winfrey

“The more you praise and celebrate your life, the more there is in life to celebrate.” ― Oprah Winfrey

“I’ve come to believe that each of us has a personal calling that’s as unique as a fingerprint – and that the best way to succeed is to discover what you love and then find a way to offer it to others in the form of service, working hard, and also allowing the energy of the universe to lead you. ”― Oprah Winfrey

If Oprah is the definition of success and #10 in America’s richest SELF made women, she has a show on OWN called “Live By the Hustle, Die by the Hustle”, and she talks more about the journey and your intuition that the hustle….the HUSTLE is not the only way to achieve massive success!

You can scale, enjoy your life and stop living by the hustle! The hustle is proven to be your path to exhaustion, overwhelm and burn out.

You have the power to reclaim your life and live a life you love.

As a successful entrepreneur that has been in business since 2002, I absolutely get it. I know how this started for you. When you first start your business there is so much to do AND you have to do it all, unless you have investors and you can hire a team, but even then it’s very easy to step into these beliefs (myths):

I have to do everything!
My work is my priority.

Eventually: the goals aren’t enough, your relationships take the toll, your health isn’t great and OVERWHELM, EXHAUSTION and BURNOUT become your way of living. It doesn’t sound very “successful” or like the life you envisioned you would create, does it??

Shifting from Hustle to Balance

There isn’t one area for you to focus on to create a shift from a hustling lifestyle back into what you originally wanted, a freedom lifestyle.

What I have found to stop the hustle and truly get back to being successful in ALL areas of your life, there are 4 areas for you to focus on, 4 patterns for YOU to shift.

Time – you just don’t have enough of it
Relationships – aren’t fulfilling or are non-existent
Inner game & Abundance – it doesn’t matter how successful you are or how many goals you hit, you HAVE to do more
Energy – you don’t have any to do anything outside of work

Everyone wants a quick fix, but your thoughts, beliefs, fears, family patterns and past life experiences have gotten you to where you are today. AND it took time to get here.

Instead of thinking, breathing and living work, start thinking about what will bring me joy:

What can I do today?
How can I have fun this month?
What days can I block out for self-care?
Who do I want to schedule in to spend time with?

The hustle is no longer working. You know. You’ve been doing it and it’s not right anymore.

I live, breathe and teach another way to reach your goals without the constant hustle and it works for me, my family and my clients.

You can scale your income without the hustle. Interested?! I invite you to connect with me and find your path to success in all areas of your life, not just work.

The hustle is not your friend. Balance is.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

3 Simple Ways to Reclaim Your Power

It doesn’t matter how successful you are, you can name at least one way you handed over your power and felt awful about it without thinking too hard with your clients, in your relationships, or even with a complete stranger.

You have old patterns and beliefs that allow you to hand over your power in certain situations. It’s almost like clock work. Your trigger happens and you hand over your power, without even realizing it happened.

And then you feel awful.

The key to creating a shift is to recognize that you have the power in each moment to create a new ending, to change how this story goes. In every moment you begin anew.

To create a shift and reclaim your power, these are the 3 things you MUST do in that moment or right after (in case you fell into your old patterns):

# 1 Be Clear

This is where you say what you actually mean to say.
You do what it is that you would like to do.

Stop people pleasing in that moment. This hands your power over on a silver platter. You know where this leads you and it is no longer supporting you.

Don’t play small. Don’t fall into those old patterns.
Catch yourself in the moment before you speak or act, as the incident is happening or immediately after the incident has happened.
Watch your energy exchanges like you are a bystander. The moment you start to feel bad, awful, or icky in an interaction, know that is your signal that you’re handing over your power and it is time to fix it. Immediately.
Catch yourself and say and do what you would like to do. If you found yourself handing over your power, your best energy move is to fix it RIGHT away – the moment you realize that you handed over your power.

Communication is the number one way people hand over their power. What will you do differently?

# 2 Hold Boundaries

Boundaries are YOUR way of telling people what is okay and what isn’t. If you don’t tell them, they don’t know. They aren’t mind readers and what is okay for another relationship may not be okay for you.

If you are new to drawing boundaries, read this article to help you get started.
When someone does not respect your boundaries, then you get to decide how to respond to their future interactions with you. You have the power.

By creating and holding those boundaries you’ve created, you reclaim your power. Who do you need to create boundaries with AND how will you hold those boundaries if they don’t adhere right away?

# 3 Stop Taking Everything Personally

When you think everything is about you – you are handing over your power to so much drama and chaos.

It is time to get objective. This allows you to be clear and realize what is your “junk” and what is someone else’s.

When you step back and get objective, like you’re watching the situation on tv, you can look at what is really going on.

Does this have anything to do with you?
Are you adding your past experience and triggers to this situation?
What is really happening in this other person’s life right now?
Is this even about YOU??? Hint, it’s probably not so don’t hand over your power trying to make someone else feel better. It doesn’t work anyhow…

Before you react – pause, breath and then respond. You’ll act more objectively and you’ll stop giving away your power.

…………………

The best way to stay in your place of power is to not hand it over in the first place. The next best thing to do is to catch yourself before you hand it over or right after you hand it over and use the tools above to reclaim it.

In every moment, you begin anew. You can change the interaction and reclaim your power. You’re not serving anyone by handing over your power, so stop doing it for YOU.

If you would like a daily reference guide to help you reclaim your time, relationships, inner game and energy, you can get it here.

Lisa Gornall is a Spiritual Medium, Healer and Coach. She is also an author, speaker and offers event support.

Lisa uses her intuitive abilities to coach career driven women at or near their breaking point to reset. Get your head, energy and life on point. Let’s get back to that freedom lifestyle you originally envisioned!

3 Self-Sabotaging Patterns that Cripple Your Revenue & Relationships

Entrepreneurs are special people. They are driven, innovative and adaptive.

The problem is that most entrepreneurs find they aren’t really enjoying the amazing life they’re creating because work goes from being a passion to being everything without even realizing it.

They also get stuck in the mindset they had when they started their business and don’t acknowledge how far they’ve come.

What got you to 6 figures energetically will not get you to 7+ figures.

There are 3 Self-Sabotaging Patterns at the heart of your Success Wound™ that I see driving every successful entrepreneur that cripple your revenue and relationships. Get objective and look at what is driving you. Are you proving:

1. I Am Worthy

Do you find yourself trying to prove that you are worthy in your work and relationships:

Trying to please other people
You feel better spending money on other people than yourself
Put others needs above your own
Do lots of work for free or low balling it, trying to prove your worth and not feeling like you’re succeeding

2. I Am Enough

Do you find yourself trying to prove that you are enough in your work and relationships:

Buying yourself stuff isn’t the problem, you struggle with enjoying it – buyers remorse
You can put your needs first but find you can’t meet them
Doesn’t matter what goals you crush, the moment you meet it, you’re onto the next one. It’s like you’re on a never-ending hamster wheel and its exhausting…you don’t ever feel like you’re enough or you’re doing enough

3. I Am Love

Do you find yourself trying to prove that you are love in your work and relationships:

In relationships, you don’t feel loved or appreciated and you’re constantly seeking it
You feel bad when others buy you stuff. You may even find you can be an emotional shopper.
By putting others needs above your own you feel resentful and empty and have no energy left. Seeking love makes you feel needy and desperate in work and relationships

Reclaim Your Power

While these beliefs can drive you to increase your income at first as you are proving yourself, they become what limits your income and relationships because they aren’t creating the happiness you are seeking ANYWHERE.

You reach a point where you become a slave to the drive that is pushing you to be worthy, enough and/or love.

Your work becomes a place where you can prove “I am worthy. I am enough. I am love.” but you don’t feel better or heal this without doing the work within because even when you HAVE the money, impact and success you don’t feel like you have it!

You have to get to the root of what is driving you (your Success Wound™), nothing external will fix this long term:

Energy cannot be manipulated.
What you think and believe, you become.
I am worthy. I am enough. I am love. These are your Universal Truths. Anything telling you otherwise, has to go. It’s time to energetically heal it and allow it to be your truth. You don’t have to prove you are these things because you ARE.
Abundance is a focus on plenty and enough for everyone, not LACK.

If you are successful, you are successful.

BUT if you think you are successful and a minute later think you don’t have any money coming in and I’m going to lose everything or not be able to retire – that’s the energy you are creating. You cripple your revenue with energy stagnation. Stop putting the brakes on your abundance, this is messing with your money, time, relationships and energy.

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Your Success

You can continue to scale your business without being driven to exhaustion anymore.

This constant drive to achieve more, do more, prove more is what I call your Success Wound™ and you can learn how to heal it here.
You are worthy. You are enough. You are love. Create an energy practice that you do everyday! This will help you connect with these crucial “I am” statements and create a shift in your income and relationships.
Reclaim your abundance mindset. You are an abundant being living in an abundant Universe. Stop believing anything less.

You have the power to make as much or as little money, impact and success as you would like. You can enjoy it or you can continue to operate from a place of lack.

Lack is a choice you no longer have to choose. Choose to live and focus on what you have and what you are, these are truths and they will change your revenue and relationships for the better: I am worthy. I am enough. I am love.

Ready for some support to heal your Success Wound™? You can book a Connection Call with Lisa here to see how she can best support you.

You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

How to Create Your Meditation Practice

Meditation and energy work are so popular right now because the constant drive and go-go-go mentality leads to stress that is harming your body.

You can check out what Harvard Health has to say about it here – meditation is an answer.

The problem is that the majority of people can’t meditate on their own, even with all the apps out there, they feel like failures and give up.

Don’t give up! There is a way to meditate and reduce your stress.

I help people who say they can’t meditate weekly at Four Seasons Aviara and I do it daily in my private coaching calls.

It is possible to meditate and feel AMAZING. It is time to take care of you!

Why Meditation Has Become Popular Again

You are told to meditate when:

You are exhausted, overwhelmed and trying to be everything to everyone.
You worry all the time.
You have the career and money but you aren’t ENJOYING your life. In fact, you are still focused on making more and doing more and you’d like to be more present. Heck – you’re probably being told to be more present.
You’re not sleeping at night on your own without assistance. You are wired and can’t fall asleep!
Your doctor wants you to get your stress level down and it helps with many disease processes (I hear this from my new meditation participants weekly at Four Seasons Aviara.)

You can absolutely go to meditation to help you calm and center, but there’s a reason why you’re struggling to meditate on your own – even with all the apps and different modalitites out there.

Why is Meditation so Hard?

Meditation will help you be present, if you have the tools to actually do it on your own.

These are the two struggles I find people have:

You don’t or can’t stop, pause and breathe, or take a moment to “be” so trying to do it on your own without support is like going to the gym without a trainer – very few are that disciplined to meditate on their own.
When you actually stop and pause – all the thoughts and messages your body tries to give you that are ignored all the time rush in during your meditation. Then you feel like a failure because you’re overwhelmed with messages and distractions, not a peaceful experience.

Notice what is driving that pain in your neck or back.
Why did you just explode at that person?
What is driving your success?

You need more than meditation.

You need an energy work practice.

Start an Energy Work Practice

I have been leading guided, energy healing meditations in my business since 2002 and in high end spas since 2015.

Combining energy work with meditation is very powerful right now because you have to do MORE than a basic MEDITATION, especially when you first start out or it won’t work for you.

You have to train your mind and body and listen to your spirit. When did you last do that?

Think about it:

You are overwhelmed, stressed and at your breaking point.
You don’t have the energy or the knowledge of how to sit and be.
You’re easily distracted by noises, thoughts, body aches, and things to do. Fears are running rampant.

But you’re going to overcome all that at will, sit down for let’s just say 5 minutes and meditate.

It won’t happen and that’s how you fail.

Daily energy work is what’s really missing and it’s simple and easy to do.

Listen to the messages your mind, body and soul are telling you. They are intentional. They will help guide you on your perfect path. Stop ignoring them.

If you make time to listen throughout the day to the messages you are receiving, they will stop interrupting you during your meditation practice and those intuitive visions will come when you are awake, and stop waking you when you are sleeping. Brilliant, right!

How to Combine Energy Work with Your Meditation

Everyone has time for meditation.

The more you meditate, the better you will feel physically and mentally.

Start with setting a timer for at least five minutes once a day and then move to twice a day.

Sit comfortably, so you can focus on your meditation, not the discomforts of your body.

Start by bringing the White Light through your body. Imagine it entering your crown (top of your head), going down your face, your neck, to your chest and back, to your stomach, to your hips, to your thighs, to your knees, down your legs, into your feet, and into the Earth.

Take three deeps breaths. When you breathe in, breathe in the White Light or a soft pastel color. When you exhale, release any tension in your body.

At this point, let your mind go blank.

Use an “I am” statement as a start to your meditation. This can be your focus for your meditation. Then imagine pastel colors, a serene place in nature, a bird, or whatever pops into your mind that relaxes you.

Go with the flow of what you are seeing and experiencing. If you start trying to think about what you are experiencing, move past the words. Do not give them power by thinking about quieting them. Just imagine you are floating away from them or focus on what you are seeing. If you feel pain in your body, you have letting go to do there.

The mind does not understand meditating. It does understand categorizing things and it tries to analyze what you are doing: “why am I here, why am I seeing this image, what should I do with this image?” Then the meditation is long gone and you are in your mind again. Do not allow your mind to have power in your meditation, just move away from its thoughts and return to your “I am” statement and pastel color.

When you are done, take a few deep breaths.

“I am love. I am safe. I am whole. I am ___________.” All is well.

Open your eyes when you are ready.

By combining energy work into your meditation practice, you will instantly feel better – at peace and ease.

Meditation is calming and centering. It will help you reduce your stress.

The best way to start your meditation practice is to add energy work into it.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

4 Must Have Boundaries

Boundaries are essential. They protect you without energetically building walls and forts.

I hear so often that people are afraid to set boundaries, they don’t want to impose on others or they don’t even know that they can set boundaries…and they feel powerless.

Here’s the thing – if you don’t set boundaries people do not know what is okay or how you would like to be treated. Most people are not mind readers.

Boundaries are a form of self-respect, worth and value. If you keep finding yourself struggling and getting triggered by the same things, I guarantee you that you don’t have boundaries in place.

Think of boundaries as guidelines for people to know what you expect in your relationships with them.

These are the 4 Must Have Boundaries to put into place right now:

#1 For Your Time

Time is your most precious resource and the number one thing I hear people need more of. We all have the same amount of hours in the day, what differs is how we spend those hours and if we spend them HOW we want to spend them.

Set a boundary: Create a schedule for your work and personal time and adhere to it. When people come to you outside of your work hours for work, let them know when you will be able to help them.

The same is true with your personal time. Schedule in time with the people you want to see and make sure you block out time for YOU to recharge.

Also set boundaries around your social media time as well – you know that can be a huge time drain!

#2 For Your Relationships

Relationship problems or drama can so easily steer you out of balance.

By creating boundaries in your relationships it lets people know what behavior is okay and what is not. A lot of times, people do not know what the boundaries are because you have not set any. What is a problem for you may be okay with someone else.

Many relationship problems stem from people being upset at how they are being treated, but they continually let it happen – change this by setting a boundary!

Set a boundary: If you don’t know how to set boundaries with the people in your life, start by paying attention to what TRIGGERS you in your relationships. That is where you need to tell people not to do that behavior.

You can ask people not to do something, not hang out with them or give the relationship space. Make sure you hold firm to the boundaries, otherwise there is no point in setting them. You can still be around them and take the tips from #3 – don’t take on their energy.

#3 For Your Energy

Do you have people or situations that drain you? You feel completely exhausted after them – that’s because they are draining your energy and you are letting it happen.

Set a boundary: Instead, know that they can do whatever they want energetically, but you imagine their energy bouncing right off of you and back to them. You do not do this in a mean or malicious way, rather an indifferent way. You simply do not let their energy imprint on you or have an effect on you.

It is like you are a mirror and it bounces off of you and right back onto them in the same way they gave it to you, allowing you to keep your energy balanced.

#4 For Your Abundance

Abundance is a powerful energy providing you with miracles, synchronicity and support. Do not let people trample on your abundance or take advantage of you.

Abundance is more than money. It is love, opportunities, support, relationships, and basically anything that is appearing in your life at this moment.

Set a boundary: Most people need to create boundaries around not allowing people into your life that just want to drain your abundance.

Sometimes that includes your past beliefs, patterns and expectations that are no longer serving you so notice where you are preventing your own abundance.

Do not give out your abundance to things you do not believe in or because you feel you have to, do it when you want to or feel inspired instead.

It is time for you to take back your power in these areas.

Boundary setting absolutely goes both ways, so make sure you respect the boundaries that others set with you. If someone is setting a boundary, they have a reason for it. Something has happened that has made this boundary important, whether it was something someone else has done or something you have done.

Respect other’s boundaries just as you would like them to respect yours.

Ready for some support to shift your energy? You can find my books here. Each book has a different focus to help you on your journey.

Categories

How You Get Stuck

You are emotionally attached to your relationship.

It’s familiar.

You’re afraid.

Change is hard.

How to Transition OUT of Your Relationship

What Are Generational Patterns?

Discovering Your Generational Patterns

Breaking Free from Your Generational Patterns

We Began to Heal her Success Wound

1. My Abilities as a Spiritual Medium

I See Spirits and Energy

I am an Energy Healer

I am Psychic

2. How I Work

I am Always Ready and On

I Work in Light

I Know Who to Work with and When

I Empower You through Coaching

Balance is Everything

1. Implement More Self-Care

2. Create Routines

3. Balance Your Schedule

4. Say “NO” More Often

Understanding the Hustle

When is the Hustle No Longer Supporting Me?

You Can Have Success without the Hustle

Shifting from Hustle to Balance

# 1 Be Clear

# 2 Hold Boundaries

# 3 Stop Taking Everything Personally

1. I Am Worthy

2. I Am Enough

3. I Am Love

Reclaim Your Power

How to Stop Self-Sabotaging Your Success

Why Meditation Has Become Popular Again

Why is Meditation so Hard?

Start an Energy Work Practice

How to Combine Energy Work with Your Meditation

These are the 4 Must Have Boundaries to put into place right now:

#1 For Your Time

#2 For Your Relationships

#3 For Your Energy

#4 For Your Abundance

It is time for you to take back your power in these areas.

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